Moving past fear

Fear is probably the biggest barrier to any sort of change. Fear of the new, fear of failure, fear of success. It can keep us on the edge of the precipice, afraid to move forward...



Do you know that famous scene in the 1950s movie with Marlon Brando, 'The Wild One': "Hey Johnny, what are you rebelling against?" he is asked. And he snarls back: "What've ya got?"

Well, fear's a bit like that isn't it? Whatever you're trying to do, the energy of fear will always be in opposition to your goal. It's not always well-founded or rational - it's just against you.

How to combat fear...
So what can you do to help yourself move past fear? I use this definition to help me combat fear:

FEAR = False Expectations Appearing Real

'The Wizard of Oz' illustrates this really well. Throughout the journey of the film, the Wizard is imagined as being this great and fearsome being. And on first meeting him, he does appear to be immensely powerful and terrifying. Yet this turns out to be all smoke and mirrors, doesn't it? The Wizard is really just a harmless little man who has created a projection to make himself seem more than he is.

That's how it is with fear. By dwelling on fear, we build it up in our minds into a seemingly insurmountable force, paralysing us into indecision and inertia. Yet, when you look fear squarely in the face, you'll discover that it's not the big scary monster you thought it was - it's just a projection.

It's all about expectations...
And the key? It's all about expectations. What do you expect to happen? If you only have an image in your mind of a negative outcome, then that's hard to get past. But if you take the time to think through what a positive outcome would be, you give your mind something else to hook into. Remember, it's only a projection. And, just like the Wizard, you have the power to change it at will.

Ask yourself, what is the worst that could happen - what if you fail to achieve your goal? Well OK, so what if you do? Is there any reason you couldn't try again, perhaps do it differently? Who says you have to do everything perfectly right - first time, every time?

Consider this quote by Samuel Smiles: "We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success; we often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery."

Ask yourself, what is the best that could happen - what if you DO achieve your goal? What would you discover about yourself by trying something new? And how great would it feel to know that you've given it a go?

Try it for yourself...
Next time you're struggling with making a decision or experiencing fear about making a change in your life, remind yourself of the Wizard of Oz and bring your FEAR back down to size.

Write down a description of this fear or fears that you're currently grappling with. Now ask yourself why do you have this fear? Sometimes even this simple process is enough to remind you that perhaps your mind has run away with itself and blown things out of proportion. If you can identify it, you can control it.

Another option is to try acting out your fear... This can be really fun! Pretend that you're the Wizard of Oz yourself and imagine a really detailed scenario, exaggerating it out to the point of ridiculousness. Push it until you can laugh at it, and yourself. Not so scary after all, is it? Remember what FEAR really means, and you'll never look at it the same way again!