The Soul Connector

Reflections on "The Four Agreements", pt. 5

2007-08-25T11:40:00.000+10:00

The Fourth Agreement integrates and firmly embeds the previous three:

"Always do your best. Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse, and regret." (p81)

This is such good advice, isn't it? It's about maintaining your focus on the present moment, exactly where your greatest power always is, and doing your very best in that moment.

I wholeheartedly agree with Ruiz that it's very useful to remind yourself that your best is going to change over time - sometimes you will have more energy and greater capacity than at other times. When you appreciate and respect that, you are able to lighten up on yourself a lot! You don't settle for a half-hearted effort, but nor do you have impossible expectations of yourself.

It's about finding your own rhythm - going with the flow of your life. I love the story that Ruiz uses as an example for this:

"There was a man who wanted to transcend his suffering so we went to a Buddhist temple to find a Master to help him. He went to the Master and asked, "Master, if I meditate four hours a day, how long will it take me to transcend?" The Master looked at him and said: "If you meditate four hours a day, perhaps you will transcend in ten years." Thinking he could do better, the man then said: "Oh, Master, what if I meditated eight hours a day, how long will it take me to transcend?"

The Master looked at him and said: "If you meditate eight hours a day, perhaps you will transcend in twenty years." "But why will it take me longer if I meditate more?" the man asked. The Master replied: "You are not here to sacrifice your joy or your life. You are here to live, to be happy, and to love. If you can do your best in two hours of meditation, but you spend eight hours instead, you will only grow tired, miss the point, and you won't enjoy your life. Do your best, and perhaps you will learn that no matter how long you meditate, you can live, love, and be happy." (p85-86)

I think this is one of the wisest passages in the book. In all that you do, never lose sight of why you are doing it. When you follow your heart and allow yourself to experience joy in whatever action you are taking, moment by moment, then you will know that you are living a meaningful life.

Putting The Four Agreements into practice is an empowering way to help you to live fully and live well. Remember to:

"Be impeccable with your word."
"Don't take anything personally."
"Don't make assumptions."
"Always do your best."

Be gentle with yourself as you implement these ideas. Do your best - but no more - in each moment and you will unleash tremendous energy and freedom in your life. And you will allow yourself to truly be all that you are, and all that you can be. Blessings to you on your transformational journey...

Reflections on "The Four Agreements", pt. 4

2007-08-13T11:17:00.000+10:00

How are you going with The Four Agreements so far? It's a real paradigm shift to not take everything personally, isn't it? But it's such an empowering approach to life!

In the Third Agreement, Ruiz takes this one step further:

"Don't make assumptions. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life." (p67)

This can be a really challenging proposition for a lot of people. If you think about it, you will realise that you make assumptions about what other people are thinking and feeling - why they're acting the way they are - all the time. Everyone does it! And because you assume this inside knowledge, it takes on the flavour of truth. You think it, therefore you believe it.

Ruiz is adamant that this is source of all human suffering:

"All the sadness and drama you have lived in your life was rooted in making assumptions and taking things personally... The whole world of control between humans is about making assumptions and taking things personally. Our whole dream of hell is based on that." (p70)

But what causes this? Ruiz goes on to explain:

"The big mitote in the human mind creates a lot of chaos which causes us to misinterpret everything and misunderstand everything. We only see what we want to see, and hear what we want to hear. We don't perceive things the way they are... We literally dream up things in our imaginations..." (p71)

Makes sense, doesn't it? It's as if each of us has our own uniquely shaded pair of glasses on, through which we view the world. And your glasses aren't the same as my glasses, so the colours and shapes don't look exactly the same. I focus on different things from you, and some things I don't see at all!

I'm reminded of the classic Indian tale about the blind men and the elephant. There are many variations on this, but the basic premise of the story is that a group of blind men go to "see" an elephant. The first one touches the elephant's leg and says that it's like a pillar. The second one touches the side of the elephant and says it's like a wall. Another man touches the trunk and says it's like a snake. And another touches the tail and says it's like a rope. You get the idea...

The interesting thing is that they're all right, and they're all wrong. Each "sees" and makes assumptions based on inadequate information. This is something that we all do, every day. Blind or not, none of us is in a position to "see" the whole picture.

This is particularly a challenge in relationships, where you make assumptions that you and your partner think exactly the same way about something - whether that be about working hours, raising a family, saving or spending money, dividing up household chores... you know how it goes. Everyone gets to discover this the hard way!

So what can you do to change this? The solution is simple: when in doubt, ask. If you don't understand something, ask for more information. Keep your communications open and truthful. Have the courage to say what you want and give those around you the opportunity to do the same. Then you will have the full picture and you can respond from a place of truth, compassion and love. By doing this, you will transform your life and your world...

Reflections on "The Four Agreements", pt. 3

2007-08-04T13:49:00.001+10:00

If you've been practicing the First Agreement, "Be impeccable with your word," you'll have begun to pay more attention to the way you're using words - both in what you think and what you say.

In the Second Agreement, Ruiz says:

"Don't take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering." (p51)

For me, this agreement is perhaps the most powerful of them all, and has the potential to bring about the most profound change in the way you live your life. This is where you choose to draw the line and take responsibility for yourself and the way you respond to experiences.

You'll recall that the Toltec refer to the miasma of multiple thoughts and programs in the mind as the mitote. Ruiz suggests that you imagine this as a giant marketplace, in which thousands of people are talking and bartering at the same time. Every single person in this marketplace of the mind has their own agenda, their own thoughts and feelings. Naturally, with all these different personalities and points of view, there are bound to be some conflicts!

Yet, as I'm sure you know, it is possible to find a stillpoint of peace in the midst of noise and confusion. You do this every time you sit in a crowded cafe to have a coffee or chat with a friend, oblivious to whatever else is going on outside your sphere of focus. You're lost in your own world, then, aren't you?

And so is everyone else around you. We may all be living on this planet together, and thus be connected and part of the whole, yet we each create and experience our OWN world. No one person's experience of this world is the same as another's. And each person's actions are driven by their own particular take on reality.

When you understand this, you can detach from allowing what other people do to colour the way you feel about yourself. And you can choose to act in a way that honours your own personal truth. Know that:

"...You can choose what you really want. You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices." (p64)

The more you do this, the more you quieten the clamour and conflict of the mitote. It's as if you are the conductor of your own personal orchestra. When you're out of alignment with your inner truth, the sounds the orchestra creates are jarring and discordant. When you're in tune with yourself, the orchestra creates beautiful music, that rises and falls with the joy of living.

As Ruiz says:

"If you keep this agreement, you can travel around the world with your heart completely open and no one can hurt you. You can say, "I love you," without fear of being ridiculed or rejected. You can ask for what you need. You can say yes, or you can say no - whatever you choose - without guilt or self-judgement. You can choose to follow your heart always." (p66)

Reflections on "The Four Agreements", pt. 2

2007-07-28T16:58:00.000+10:00

Like millions of other people around the world, I just read the last Harry Potter book this week. The magical world of Harry Potter has a lot of appeal, doesn't it? But did you ever imagine that you could be a magician in real life?

Well, whether you realise it or not, you are a kind of magician! Just as Harry and his companions - friend or foe - go into battle with one another, so too do you and everyone around you.

Of course you don't wave a wand, but you do exercise an incredible power: the power of your WORD.

In the First Agreement, Ruiz states:

"Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love." (p27)

Ruiz goes on to elaborate:

"Being impeccable is not going against yourself. When you are impeccable, you take responsibility for your actions, but you do not judge or blame yourself." (p35)

That is such a powerful proposition, isn't it? Not going against yourself, only saying what you mean - speaking your truth. Seeking not to cause harm to yourself or others, yet doing so without judgement.

In the world of Harry Potter, the characters must learn how to use words of power in the right way, for they can cause great harm. Yet, in our world, we don't think about the power of the spoken word. We use words carelessly and thoughtlessly, but to equally powerful effect - to criticise ourselves and others, and either intentionally or unintentionally cause harm.

The First Agreement is a wakeup call from that state of "sleep" to a state of conscious choice about how you use the power of your word - both in how you address yourself and the way you talk to, and about, others.

Integrity is something to value most highly. The word integrity comes from the Latin, integritas, meaning soundness, wholeness or completeness. It also implies some sort of moral code - like an inner compass that guides you in right action.

You can actually feel it when you speak and act with integrity - it's like a positive resonance within you. And using the power of your word from a place of integrity, generates waves of positive energy that flow outwards into the world. In fact, your word is powerful enough to create your world.

Consider the well-known aphorism: "Know thyself." This was said to have been placed above the ancient Temple of Apollo at Delphi, to which people travelled from far and wide to seek out guidance from the great Oracle. Despite the function of the Oracle being to dispense wisdom, the words suggest the questioner turn inwards, rather than outwards, to obtain true wisdom.

For this is the greatest truth: you have all the answers you need within you. You already are whole and complete - you just need to remind yourself that this is the case.

Honour yourself by behaving with integrity and speaking your truth, coming from a place of love and compassion, and your experience of the world will be one in which others mirror this behaviour and reflect the same wholeness and truth, love and compassion back to you.

A magical world indeed, wouldn't you say?

Reflections on "The Four Agreements", pt. 1

2007-07-04T22:36:00.000+10:00

Have you read or heard of The Four Agreements? It's a beautiful and insightful book, written in 1997 by Don Miguel Ruiz, a master of the Toltec mystery school tradition. The Toltec are an ancient culture from southern Mexico, who dwelt in the city of Teotihuacan, outside modern-day Mexico City. They were a society of scientists and artists whose goal was to preserve spiritual knowledge and practices.

In The Four Agreements, Ruiz shares these teachings with us, explaining how each of us forms an internal belief system that dictates the way we respond to life:

"Your whole mind is a fog which the Toltecs called a mitote... Your mind is a dream where a thousand people talk at the same time, and nobody understands each other." (p18)

What happens, is we filter through the fog and hone in on what particularly captures our attention:

"Attention is the ability to determine and to focus only on that which we want to perceive. We can perceive millions of things simultaneously, but using our attention, we can hold whatever we want to perceive in the foreground of our mind." (p5)

What we pay attention to, and (even passively) agree with, becomes embedded and enshrined in what Ruiz calls our own "Book of Law". As the name suggests, this becomes the basis for an internal system of judgement, in which we automatically judge everything we think, feel and do, in response to whatever crosses our path:

"As children, we didn't have the opportunity to choose our beliefs, but we agreed with the information that was passed to us from the dream of the planet via other humans. The only way to store information is by agreement." (p7)

If you think about it, you can intuitively feel when something is IN alignment with your internal guidance system, and when something is out of whack:

"Whatever goes against the Book of Law will make you feel a funny sensation in your solar plexus, and it's called fear... Even if the Book of Law is wrong, it makes you feel safe. That is why we need a great deal of courage to challenge our own beliefs. Because even if we know we didn't choose all those beliefs, it is also true that we agreed to all of them." (p12-13)

So what happens? We don't like the uncertain feeling of going against what's written in this internal book of judgement, even if we know it's not right. We fall into the trap of trying to please others, thinking that they're judging us, when it's actually self-judgement we're experiencing and projecting onto others. And so:

"We create an image of how we should be in order to be accepted by everybody... Trying to be good enough for them, we create an image of perfection, but we don't fit this image... We are never going to be perfect from this point of view. Never!" (p19)

But it is possible to change this internal belief system. As Ruiz says:

"If we can see it is our agreements which rule our life, and we don't like the dream of our life, we need to change the agreements. When we are finally ready to change our agreements, there are four very powerful agreements that will help us break those agreements that come from fear and deplete our energy... Instead of living in a dream of hell, you will be creating a new dream - your personal dream of heaven." (p24-25)

Over the next four weeks, I will be sharing and exploring those four agreements with you - one each week. I invite you to read and reflect along with me - kind of like our very own online book club. I'd love to hear your feedback as to how these ideas resonate with your own understanding and experiences. I look forward to taking the journey with you!

Permission to play

2007-06-26T07:04:00.000+10:00

You may have noticed that I haven't posted to my blog for several weeks. I had a bout of flu a few weeks ago, which was a real wakeup call for me to do more self-nurturing than I'd been doing. Yes, even life coaches need to work at life balance!

I'd clearly got run down and realised that I needed to lighten my workload a bit and allow myself more time to play. You'd think I'd know this already, eh? I certainly talk about it enough with my clients.

But life balance is a dynamic process and sometimes you need to push too hard in one direction in order to notice that you're neglecting another area of your life. The important thing IS to notice. And a change in your health is a sure sign that you need to be doing something differently.

So what I've been doing for myself is lots of drawing, painting and collaging. And not much writing. It's been working a treat - I really feel like I've been replenishing my soul! Because I don't make a living from my art, there are no constraints on what I can or can't do. No deadlines, no pressure. I find it a very restful process, even meditative.

Do you have something creative in your life like that? I can highly recommend it. It's a fabulous antidote to work stress. If you're feeling tired and flat or lacking in motivation for your work, then do something about it NOW. Preferably before your body has to step in and insist on a rest, by falling ill!

I've included one of my collages here, by way of inspiration. So get out there and find your creative muse - give yourself permission to play...

Perfect as you are

2007-05-29T03:29:00.000+10:00

I have a confession to make: I'm a perfectionist! That can be a good thing, because it means I aspire to high standards. But sometimes it's definitely not a good quality to have, because there are occasions when I drive myself far too hard. I think that, fundamentally, everyone wrestles with something similar - we're all constantly judging ourselves in one way or another. How do I measure up to this 'standard' that I've set for myself?

But what if you could let go of all judgement? What if you could allow yourself to be perfect exactly as you are, right now?

In The Gift, P'taah (channeled by Jani King) says:

Sometimes you relate the idea of perfection to a finished product and you perceive that when you are perfect, you will be a 'finished' article, so to speak. There is no finish, there is no end. Who you are at this moment, in this now, is perfection of the Mind of Creation, unto Infinity.

That certainly resonates for me! How about you?

Today, why not take some time to accept and appreciate all that you are - without judgement. Know that in reality there is no judgement, simply moment after perfect moment. Allow yourself to be in this moment. Allow yourself to be all that you are.

In the words of P'taah:

Enlightenment is not about being good. It is about BEING.

Sacred walking

2007-05-06T14:18:00.000+10:00

I went for a wonderful walk early this morning. I drove to the botanical gardens in my home city of Melbourne and spent a couple of hours there - walking, sitting, meditating.

What I was doing was what I call "sacred walking" - allowing myself to connect with the peace and oneness of Nature on this lovely Autumn morning. I felt serene and totally replenished afterwards.

Consider this beautiful quote from Charmaine White Face of the Oglala Sioux:

One of our old, old Holy Men said, "Every step you take on Earth should be a Prayer. The power of a pure and good Soul is in every person's Heart and will grow as a seed as you walk in a Sacred manner. And if every step you take is a Prayer, then you will always be walking in a Sacred manner."

Today, make some time to get out in Nature and try "walking in a Sacred manner". You can do this anywhere - your garden, a local park, the beach, the bush or a wilderness area. The important thing is to experience this alone, so that you can enjoy your own unique connection - to yourself and the oneness of All That Is.

There's nothing special that you need to do, in fact you'll find that it works as a kind of emptying of "self" and a wonderful release of anything that may have been worrying you. Let go and simply allow yourself to be...

Starting the day right

2007-04-25T16:09:00.000+10:00

What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning? Did you feel good, anticipating what gifts the day may bring? Or were you a bit apprehensive, worrying about how much you have to get done today? Maybe you weren't thinking about anything much, just wishing for a bit more sleep!

It's amazing how your very first thoughts - your frame of mind and emotional state - can set the tone for your entire day. Life is more than a series of random events, isn't it? There's always a bigger picture at play, whether or not it's visible to you. Most people are oblivious to this but, if you pay attention to your starting point each day, you can actually influence the kind of day you have.

Your state of mind produces a kind of forcefield of energy around you, and you subconsciously attract or repel experiences based on your positive or negative internal state. Stop for a minute and think about a day when you woke up feeling really great. Chances are that you felt "in tune" with yourself and the entire day felt easy and productive.

Now think about a day where things didn't go well for you. If you backtrack in your mind to the beginning of that day, it's very likely that you started off in a bad mood and carried that around with you all day, a little like your own personal stormcloud.

So what can you do about that? What if you do wake up feeling grumpy, for whatever reason? How can you shake off that mood and start over with a more positive frame of mind? Or even if you wake up in a fairly neutral headspace, how can you encourage yourself to get out there in an optimistic and confident state of being?

Visualise a positive state...
The mind is a powerful tool. Think of it as your ally rather than your enemy - it's not about going into battle with yourself. Imagine yourself as the commander, calm and in control, consciously issuing clear and straightforward instructions that your subconscious mind will unhesitatingly follow.

Your mind loves positive reinforcement! And that's exactly what you're going to give it... So, instead of immediately leaping out of bed first thing in the morning, stay there for an extra five minutes. Close your eyes again and breathe slowly and deeply. Allow your mind to become still...

Now imagine that you are looking at yourself: the absolute "best self" that you can be. Standing right there in front of you, like a mirror image, with a big smile on your face! See yourself, dressed in a fabulous outfit... exuding calm and centredness... radiating powerful energy and self-confidence... Allow yourself to take in every detail. Make your vision as vivid as you possibly can.

Then imagine that you are stepping into this mirror image of yourself... that you are becoming your radiant, powerful, confident self. How does it feel, to be the "best self" that you can be? Allow yourself to feel the strength within you, the wisdom within you... Enjoy the feeling that anything is possible... Remind yourself that this is your true state of being. Know that this radiance, this power, this self-confidence is available to you always...

When you're ready, bring your attention back to the present... bringing back with you that sense of calm and confidence... and setting you up perfectly for the day.

Wash it off in the shower...
Another simple but effective technique is to use your time in the shower in the morning. It's great if you're in a hurry or are feeling grumpy, because you don't need to take any extra time out of your morning routine. Here's how it works...

When you step into the shower, imagine that the water is extra powerful today - it's going to cleanse you inside and out. As you stand underneath the stream of water, imagine that the water is flowing through your mind and washing away all negative thoughts, all worries, all stress, all tiredness... washing it all away...

Then imagine that the water is flowing through your emotions... cleansing and releasing all negative feelings, all anger, all frustration, all self-doubt, all impatience... washing it all away...

And then, as you soap yourself up, washing your hair, your face, your body, allow the water to cleanse and rejuvenate your entire body.... So that when you step out of the shower, you will feel completely cleansed and energised and ready to get on with your day.

Remember to start the day right and you'll set yourself up for a truly great day!

Life on the edge

2007-04-18T21:51:00.000+10:00

I was saddened to hear of the death of novelist Kurt Vonnegut Jr last week, author of some wonderful novels - like Slaughterhouse-Five, Jailbird, Cat's Cradle and Mother Night. Reading his books has made me laugh out loud many times, and sometimes be greatly moved as well.

One thing that I always liked about Vonnegut was his idiosyncratic style - a truly original and distinctive view of the world. He once said:

I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.

Isn't that a great attitude? Sometimes it's good to just get out there and challenge yourself and throw yourself wholeheartedly into life.

American baseball player, Vernon Law said:

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward.

That's certainly real life, isn't it? It can be tempting to hold yourself back because you can't see exactly what's out there on the path ahead. But then you might miss out on making some truly interesting discoveries and learning the most important lessons.

Today, think what about Kurt Vonnegut's approach means for how you're living your life: Are you playing anything a bit too safe? Is there something that you'd really love to do that you've maybe been holding yourself back from trying? Well, why not give it a go? Who knows where the journey will take you?

In the words of another great ball player, Babe Ruth:

Don't let the fear of striking out hold you back.

Turning shoulds into coulds

2007-04-10T23:13:00.000+10:00

Ever had one of those days where you feel completely worn down by "shoulds"? "I should do this... I should do that..." But what you really want to do is something else altogether...

Sound familiar? It's not always easy to say no to life's demands, especially if you're in the habit of putting other people's needs before your own. But it's vital to become aware of what it is that you truly need, and to honour that truth.

So, what can you do when you feel "guilted" into doing things - feeling overwhelmed by all those things you think you "should" do? How can you make affirmative choices for yourself?

Denise Linn, in her book Soul Coaching, nails the source of this problem:

"Self-criticism is part of the shadow self. It is the part that tells you that you should do something, and then causes you to feel guilty or ashamed because you are not doing it."

Denise devised a wonderful exercise to deal with this:

Today, make a list of all the things that you SHOULD DO. Then take each item and ask yourself these questions:

1. "Who says I should?"
2. "Why should I?"

Let your mind brainstorm for a bit and see if there are any childhood memories or associations regarding this "should". Is it YOUR "should", or did it come from someone or somewhere else?

Now write the list again, and this time, change "should" for "could" and after it write: "... but I choose not to at this time."

Try this out for yourself - you'll be amazed at how empowering it is! Somehow, saying "should" automatically implies guilt - it lowers your energy just thinking about it, doesn't it? But substituting the word "could" actually raises your energy - it puts you back in control of your choices, whether or not you ultimately choose to take action right now or not.

By letting go of the weight of all those "shoulds", you liberate yourself to respond to the really important things, like honouring your own needs - and your own truth.

Decisions, decisions...

2007-03-28T19:59:00.000+10:00

Ever get stuck trying to come to a decision about something? Perhaps you know the feeling... a knot in the pit of your stomach... maybe a stress headache as well. If it's a really major decision, it can feel almost as if you're paralysed. So what do you do to break the impasse? This week I'd like to share a few simple strategies, to add to your toolkit, that you can use in those stuck situations.

Do I need to make a decision right now?
The first thing to do is not to force yourself to reach a decision immediately, even if it's an important one. Often it's putting too much pressure on yourself that can make you freeze up. So give yourself some breathing space - literally. Get up and walk away for a minute, have a stretch, take a few deep breaths... Simply shifting your energy like this can sometimes be enough to break a brainlock and allow your intuition to come into play.

Come back to your decision again when you're feeling more relaxed - you may be surprised at how differently you feel about it and how much easier it is to work through to a solution.

Is it a yes or no decision?
It may be that just making a decision to go one way or the other is the best course of action. It may not matter which choice you make - by making a choice, you start to build momentum for yourself again, and then you can work out as you go how you might be able to do it better. Follow the maxim:

Do it... then fix it.

If it's a simple yes or no decision, you can always toss a coin (heads for yes, tails for no); use a pendulum (swinging backwards and forwards for yes, left to right for no); or some other aid that works for you. This mighn't seem like a rational way to make a decision - and that's the point. Sometimes you need to let your head step out of the way and allow your intuition to guide you.

How do I really feel about this decision?
Your body is a great communicator, so enlist its help with making your decision. Take a moment to relax and centre yourself. Now think about one possible outcome of your decision - imagine as vividly as you can that this is the choice that you've made. How does this feel? Does it feel good? Does your body feel warm or loose or comfortable? Or does it feel bad? Does your body feel cold or tight or uncomfortable?

Go through this process for each possible choice you could make with this decision. Then follow your instincts as to which choice feels like the best one for you - the one that feels aligned and in flow for you.

Do I need to release my fear?
Suppose you've made a decision that you do want to take action to move towards a particular goal. But what if you're still hesitating about it? Sit down, take a deep breath, and be as honest as you can with yourself about what you're feeling. Are you experiencing resistance because of fear (eg fear of failure, fear of making a fool of yourself, fear of success, fear of change)?

If so, gently acknowledge that this is the case. Then remind yourself about the definition you can use to combat fear:

FEAR = False Expectations Appearing Real

If you need to, go back over my post titled "Moving past fear" (from November 2006), which goes through in more detail how to deal with fear. Ask yourself: How real is this fear that I'm experiencing? What can I do to take the energy out of it and let it go?

Am I really ready to change?
OK, so you've dealt with the fear aspect. If you're still not quite there yet, there's another exercise you can try...

Grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle of it. Label the left-hand column 'NO CHANGE'. Then write down what you could expect to happen in your life if you do not make this change - be detailed and truthful. Include how you will feel if you don't make the change.

Label the right-hand column 'CHANGE'. Then write down what you could expect to happen in your life if you do make this change, including how you will feel when you have achieved your goal.

Now look back over your two lists. Usually, the positives in the 'CHANGE' column will outweigh any negatives in the 'NO CHANGE' column. If this is the case, then you've just given yourself some compelling motivation to move forward with your decision.

If not, then acknowledge for yourself that perhaps now is not the right time for this. Try shelving the decision for a while and allow yourself to have a bit more time to sit with it. Set a time to come back to consider it again (eg in a day, a week or a month) and then repeat the process. Chances are that something will have shifted for you by then, and you'll be able to work through to a resolution.

Be gentle...
Remember, above all, to be gentle with yourself, rather than placing on tons of pressure. You will find that you make the best decisions when your focus is present in the moment, without being held too tightly. Everyone is different, so explore these different strategies and find the one that works for you... And happy decision making!

The first day

2007-03-20T00:56:00.000+11:00

I've just been listening to a Crowded House song (written by Neil Finn and Tim Finn), "All I Ask", which seems very apt:

"All I ask
is to live each moment
free from the last..."

A beautifully simple way of expressing what is really a profound concept...

I'm sure you've experienced the feeling of carrying the weight of the world around on your shoulders - I think everyone has days like that. An accumulation of "stuff" from the past. When, of course, you don't need to be doing that! In truth, each moment is a fresh start. And if you choose to treat it as such, then you give yourself the opportunity to move through your daily life feeling much lighter and unencumbered.

So how do you do that? Well, there's a saying: "live each day as if it's your last", which is a way of reminding you to focus in on what really matters. But what if you were to try living each day as if it's your FIRST? Think about that for a moment... How would doing this affect how you approach all your daily activities? What might you do differently, if you looked at it with fresh eyes? What might you appreciate more, that you usually take for granted?

Why not try this for yourself, when you get up tomorrow? For me, it actually feels very liberating! I make a conscious effort to do this from time to time, just paying attention to what comes up for me on the day. Often it's the little things that strike me the most - what I usually barely even notice when I'm rushing around...

Things like... the colour and shape of a perfect pink rose in my garden... the fragrance and taste of a crisp green apple... a smile and wave from the elderly woman who lives down the street... the warmth of the sun on my face as I sit at a cafe drinking my morning coffee. The simple joy and beauty of everyday life.

Changing your life doesn't have to be about attracting in a whole lot of new things, or even doing things radically differently. It's about valuing what you do have and allowing the flow of life in - which is brimming with sweetness and magic, if you but open your eyes to see it...

Being in balance

2007-03-10T14:14:00.000+11:00

One of my clients posed a really good question this week:

"What does it actually mean to be in balance? Can you truly achieve that in your life, or is it just something you kind of aspire to get to?"

So let's explore this today...

I've noticed that, initially, many people are a bit resistant to the notion of balance. And rightfully so. This is because balance is usually perceived as being about reaching a state of equilibrium - a static state - and so, realistically, how can you create that in the midst of the ebb and flow of life? How can you grow, when you're staying the same?

In reality, balance is a dynamic process which, when you understand how it works, IS something you can make work for you in your own life. I had a vivid dream a few nights ago that struck me as a great way of illustrating this principle. In my dream I was a fabulous skateboarder - in reality, I've never even set foot on a skateboard but, hey, you can do anything you wish in dreams, can't you?

In the dream, the feeling of riding the skateboard was absolutely exhilarating - a feeling of oneness and of being in tune with a powerful flow of energy. I've sure you've seen really talented skateboarders in action - they're very focused, yet they have an air of ease and centredness about them, making even the most difficult manoevres look effortless.

And, of course, they are in perfect balance - while being in perpetual motion. So, with that image in mind, how does this translate to your life? Looked at this way, balance is the complete opposite of being in some kind of motionless, unchanging state, isn't it?

Let's look more closely at those two words I used to describe great skateboarders - ease and centredness - because they provide the keys to feeling balanced. Life balance is about finding your centre in the midst of the ups and downs of the various aspects of your life, and the external forces of the environment around you.

But this doesn't have to feel like a struggle... Picture, for a moment, that your life is like a big arena, with the different domains of activity (eg work, home, relationships, money, health, creativity, spirituality) laid out on the ground in sectors, like the spokes within a wheel. Know that you're the master of this domain. Imagine that you are the fabulous skateboarder here, who is able to effortlessly move around the arena.

Picture this in your mind and feel how easily you are able to flow from one aspect of your life to another - and how much fun it is to be focused on where you are, yet remain relaxed. You choose which aspect of your life you wish to place your focus on at this moment in time. And there's no need to be everywhere at once, is there? Allow yourself to feel your natural oneness with the environment and the universe around you... Experience the flow of energy within you and around you, and know that this is your true state of being...

So... next time you're feeling stressed and unbalanced in your daily life, remind yourself of this feeling of ease and oneness. Bring your attention back to where you are right now and reconnect with that master rider within who will always know the right direction to take to get you where you need to go...

Spiral Books & Gifts open!

2007-03-01T23:19:00.000+11:00

A departure from my usual blog this week, but I wanted to share some great news... I'm really pleased to be able to tell you that Spiral, A Spiritual Sanctuary, is now officially open!

Originally founded in the 1970s, Spiral Books & Gifts is fondly remembered by many as one of Melbourne's best New Age bookstores. As you may know, Spiral now has a new owner and has relocated to 487 Malvern Road, Toorak.

The shop is open 7 days a week and stocks a wonderful range of metaphysical and self-help books, as well as oils, herbs, candles, tarot decks, crystals, jewellery, CDs and gift items.

The Spiral centre also offers healing and massage, clairvoyant/tarot readings and spiritual life coaching, and includes a gallery/workshop space featuring a dynamic calendar of courses and events.

I will be there on Fridays and Saturdays for coaching sessions and workshops. Phone (03) 9826 1164 for bookings or just call in to say hello and have a browse. I'd be delighted to see you!

For those of you from further afield, an online shop is currently under construction, so I'll keep you posted on the details...

Aligning with the new

2007-02-21T19:41:00.000+11:00

Wondering what's going on out there? Have you noticed the energy shifts that have been going on lately? I'm definitely still processing it all!

As you may be aware, a particularly strong inter-dimensional alignment has just taken place over the past week, which has involved aligning energies on the third, ninth and twelfth dimensions. As multi-dimensional beings, this has been affecting each of us on several levels - the third dimension is the level at which we interact on the physical earth plane, the ninth encompasses our higher mental selves, and the twelfth is the soul essence level.

So you can begin to understand how significant an event this is! You now have the opportunity to allow yourself to shift into Divine balance and align the three major aspects of yourself - namely body, mind and spirit.

Notice how you're feeling...
Think about how you've been feeling over the last week or two... Many people I've spoken to recently have reported feeling unusually drained or disoriented. Be assured that this is completely normal - be very gentle with yourself at this time, and know that the experience will be different for everyone.

Personally, I've noticed the impact of this energy shift coming out in some unexpected ways. Apart from an overall feeling of tiredness and a bit of vagueness, which I did expect, I've had to make several visits to the chiropractor because I found that my neck and spine were out of alignment in a few places!

My physical body seems to be lagging a bit behind the shifts I've been making on higher energetic levels and so needs a bit of extra support to properly realign now. I've been finding that yoga and meditation has been really helping with the process of integration - concentrating on gentle stretching and deep breathing, and being aware of the energy flow.

If you haven't been doing anything like this lately, it would be worth thinking about adding some sort of practice into your daily routine that enables you to work with the three levels of your being.

Be present in the moment...
So what does this alignment really mean, as you go about your day? I think the most important thing to focus on right now is finding a sense of balance and harmony in your life. Sometimes change can feel so overwhelming that you get caught up in stress and anxiety - usually this is a sign that your attention has wandered out into the future or the past. The way to cut through this is to take a moment to breathe deeply and centre yourself back into the present.

I talk a lot about being in the moment, because this is the secret to opening up communication with the higher aspects of yourself - your soul speaks to you in the eternal now moment. Your centre of power is here. Eckhart Tolle, author of The Power of Now, summed it up beautifully:

"Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have."

Practice consciously bringing your awareness into the present, and take action as you are guided by your intuition - which is really the voice of your soul - and you will feel more balanced, experience greater energy and a stronger alignment within your being.

Seize the moment

2007-02-13T18:28:00.000+11:00

I watched the movie Dead Poets Society again the other day. Among many inspiring scenes, I was really struck by the one where the new English teacher, played by Robin Williams, fires up his class with the phrase: carpe diem! In Latin, this means "seize the day". He uses the words as a call to action - a challenge to each individual to be fully alive and make the most of life.

My favourite motto is even more immediate than this: carpe punctum, which means "seize the moment". This is a reminder to stay focused on the present moment, rather than worrying about the future or the past. Have you ever thought about how much time you waste in a day - either in the past, fretting over something you didn't get finished or that didn't go perfectly; or out there in the future, stressing about all those things still sitting on your to-do list? And to what end?

I love this quote by Allan Johnson:

"The past is history;
The future is a mystery;
This moment is a gift;
That is why this moment is called the present;
Enjoy it."

That is wonderful advice! The greatest point of power is to be found right here, right now. Concentrating on the present enables you to cut through all the stuff that doesn't matter and hone in on the real essentials. Realistically, you can have a number of things on the boil at once, but you can actually only do one piece at a time. It's incredibly liberating to shift your focus in this way. What is the one most important thing you need to focus on right now?

Make every action you take truly matter. Consider this Buddhist saying:

"If you want to know your past, look into your present conditions.
If you want to know your future, look into your present actions."

Think about what this really means for your life. Whatever is going on in your life right now is a result of how you thought and acted in the past - regardless of whether you intentionally set out to manifest this or not. But, most importantly, you're creating your future through the way you are thinking and acting in this very moment. You have the power to change your life for the better simply by setting a clear intention for what you DO want.

There is magic in doing this. You can tap into incredible energy when you consciously direct your thinking. What you focus on is what you are creating in your life. As I said last week, that doesn't mean that every single thought that flies through your head has to be a positive one! It takes some time to set new thought patterns. Work at it... stick with it... and bit by bit you will shift your mind out of negative ruts and into a more positive arena.

Try out carpe punctum as your new motto and apply yourself to making the most of each moment of your day... And enjoy every minute of it!

The secret is out!

2007-02-04T13:56:00.000+11:00

Have you seen the movie, The Secret? It screened last night on Australian television, on Channel 9. And it's generated a lot of buzz - with good reason...

The Law of Attraction...
In an engagingly clear and graphic manner, it communicates the fundamental principle known as the Law of Attraction. So now the secret is out!

The executive producer of the show, Rhonda Byrne, says that she was initially inspired by reading the classic text The Science of Getting Rich, which was written in 1910 by Wallace D. Wattles. Many others (including me!) have been equally inspired by this book, which describes how to understand and utilise the Law of Attraction to attract health, wealth and happiness into your life.

In his book Wattles explained that, at the heart of the Law of Attraction:

"Everything you see on earth is made from one original substance, out of which all things proceed."

In other words, no matter how things may appear on the surface, at a quantum level everything on earth and indeed throughout the entire universe, consists of energy - pure creative potential - and this is the basic building block for all matter.

Wattles said:

"A thought, in this substance,
produces the thing that is imaged by the thought."

So... if you think it, you can create it. If you first generate something in your mind, then you can cause it to be created in your life - out of the creative substance of the universe. And there is no limit to what you can attract into your life in this way. If the entire universe is made up of this creative substance, then it's never going to run out, is it?

One is All, and All is One...
The only thing to keep in mind, is that what you wish for should be for the benefit of others as well as yourself - in line with the principle that "One is All, and All is One". As Wattles put it:

"The universe desires you to have everything you want to have. Everything is natural for you.
Make up your mind that this is true.
It is essential, however that your purpose should harmonize with the purpose that is in All."

This doesn't mean that you shouldn't desire all of life's comforts - on the contrary, life IS meant to be easy! Merely that, in wishing to create an easier and more richly rewarding life for yourself, the others around you are also benefiting from greater wellbeing for themselves.

Thus, Wattles cautioned:

"You are to become a creator, not a competitor; you are going to get what you want, but in such a way that when you get it every other man will have more than he has now."

Remember that there is unlimited abundance available to all, so there is no need to compete with others. If you get away from the notion of lack and limit, then your natural impulse is to wish others to enjoy life as much as you do. That's certainly how it's worked for me!

Affirmative thought beats negative thought...
OK then, if your thought creates your reality, what about the impact of negative thoughts? This is one of the big issues that often comes up when you start working with the Law of Attraction. As you begin to pay attention to your thoughts - understanding that whatever you are giving energy to, you are actually bringing into being - you may be appalled to discover the amount of negative thoughts you've been having!

Well, don't worry... As Michael Beckwith, one of the individuals interviewed for The Secret, says:

"It has been proven now scientifically, that an affirmative thought is hundreds of times more powerful than a negative thought."

That's very reassuring, isn't it? Now you know that you've got all the ammunition you need to combat negative thinking - simply by concentrating on introducing one new affirmative thought at a time, you can drown out those other niggly little negative ones.

Oh, and know that you've always got time to make better choices too. In case you're wondering why you don't get instant results from this new thinking process, consider for a moment what would happen if you did. Imagine if every single thought that flew through your mind instantaneously manifested in real life - eek!

Remind yourself of this if you ever reach a point where you're feeling frustrated or disheartened about not seeing visible results straight away. The reason that there's a time delay built into the process, is to give you the opportunity to be really sure that you DO want something and to give it energy to create it in the best possible way. But it doesn't always have to take a long time... miracles can happen, you know!

Begin it now...
So what are you waiting for? What is the one thing you most desire to bring into your life? Go ahead and tap into the power of the Law of Attraction right now...

Think it... believe it... HAVE IT!

The heart of change

2007-01-29T00:18:00.000+11:00

Leo Tolstoy, author of War and Peace, wrote:

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no-one thinks of changing himself.

There's a lot of truth in that. So often our focus is directed outwards - there's always stuff in the environment around us that needs "fixing", isn't there? It's far more challenging to turn your gaze inward and consider what you need to work on in yourself.

The Chinese philosopher, Confucius, was very specific about the importance of doing this:

To put the world in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must cultivate our personal life; and to cultivate our personal life, we must first set our hearts right.

It makes sense to start with oneself when seeking to effect any change, because the way we are within ourselves, and how we live and interact with others, impacts on everything and everyone around us. It's too much for any of us to conceptualise single-handedly changing the entire world anyway, because every other individual on the planet is co-creating it along with us. But it is realistic to accept responsibility for our own experience of the world. And then appreciate that, in the greater scheme of things, we're all interconnected.

A heart-centred life...
So what does it mean to "set our hearts right"? Quite simply, I think this means to lead a heart-centred life - to be loving towards yourself and to those around you, and to treat others the way you would want to be treated. This is also about expressing what's in your heart - being true to your self, by finding and following your purpose in life.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery, author of The Little Prince, summed it up beautifully:

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
what is essential is invisible to the eye.

Too often we get caught up in things that aren't really important - all the complicated drama and minutiae of daily life. But if you go inward, and gently hold your awareness in the centre of your chest, your heart centre, you will find that you are able to cut through to what really matters. The heart is the guide to truth.

Try this for yourself...
Today, take some time out to listen to your heart... Find a comfortable place where you won't be disturbed. Sit or lie down, close your eyes, breathe deeply and allow yourself to completely relax.

Visualise a golden ball of light in the centre of your chest, in the centre of your heart. Enjoy the feeling of holding this warm, loving energy there. Now, imagine this golden light gently burning through all negative thoughts and feelings, lovingly and effortlessly dissolving all obstacles and blockages...

Visualise that this golden light is radiating out from your heart and flowing throughout your body, aligning your entire being with the loving energy of your heart. Now seek the guidance of your heart: Ask, what message do you have for me now? Then, simply allow the answer to come to you in the perfect way and at the perfect time.

Repeat this exercise any time you feel in need of inner guidance. As you go about your day, you may also choose to use this affirmation, to support your expression of the guidance of your heart:

Infinite Spirit knows my heart's desires.
Infinite Spirit clears all obstacles from my path to bring my heart's desire to me now.

Don't fight it, feel it

2007-01-21T22:34:00.000+11:00

I'm a big fan of 60s soul music and one of my all-time favourite albums is by Sam Cooke, Live at the Harlem Square Club, 1963. It's rough, energetic and life-affirming. Cooke's joy in singing is totally infectious - just hearing it will make you wish you were there! The opening track on the album is called "Feel It" and has the line:

"Don't fight it, feel it."

I think that's really good advice to live by...

Think about this for a moment: Does your life always flow easily for you, or do you seem to expend a lot of time and energy resisting change? Have you ever felt like you're virtually dragging yourself along through life, kicking and screaming? I suspect we've all had moments like that!

But it doesn't need to be that hard. The saying: "what you resist, persists" is very true. Sometimes we can really fight the circumstances of life and, in the process, inadvertently make everything much harder than it needs to be. The more you fight a situation, the more you give it energy - so the more it is here to stay.

When you encounter resistance, it's usually an indicator of where you have control issues in your life - and this is about fear. Ask yourself: What is it that you're hanging onto so tightly? What are you afraid of letting yourself experience? What would happen if you let go of this and simply allowed life to unfold?

Allow yourself to be supported...
Sometimes you need to let yourself step outside of your comfort zone, in order to discover that it's possible to experience things in a new - and better - way. It does take courage to surrender yourself to the unknown. It's a leap of faith to trust that the universe will support you... but it always does.

As the poet Guillaume Apollinaire wrote:

Come to the edge, he said.
They said: we are afraid.
Come to the edge, he said.
They came.
He pushed them... and they flew.

Instead of resisting where the flow of your life is taking you, allowing yourself to "go with the flow" releases powerful creative energy because you're letting yourself be in tune with the true nature of the universe. There is a Divine plan for your life and when you choose to allow it to unfold, you will find that things become easier and more meaningful. Everything falls into place and life is exhilarating instead of exhausting!

Try this for yourself...
So how can you practice letting go and experiencing the flow of life? Well there's a line in a Beatles song that offers a good suggestion. "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds", written by John Lennon, begins:

"Picture yourself in a boat on a river..."

This makes a wonderful meditation. Next time you're feeling stressed or anxious about a situation in your life, take some time out to relax and imagine that you're in the midst of a beautiful, peaceful landscape. You're lying back in a boat, gently floating down a great, smooth-flowing river. You are right in the centre of the current... and there's no need to steer, because the river is taking care of you, safely and serenely. Simply allow yourself to go with the current... and enjoy the feeling of going with the Divine flow of life...

The gift of oneself

2007-01-15T16:26:00.000+11:00

I read a great quote yesterday, from Mother Theresa:

"We can do no great things. Only small things with great love."

How wise that is!

I know there have been times in my life when I've berated myself for not doing more or thinking I could have tried harder in a particular situation - chances are that you've done this to yourself too. But the truth is: all any of us can do is our best, in any given moment. And it doesn't matter if that isn't something big or grand - what matters is that we put our hearts into it. Because bringing about change in the world happens through doing one small thing at a time... with love.

I think we need to keep reminding ourselves of this, don't we? Especially when looking forward and imagining all the wonderful things we'd like to manifest in our lives. Lose sight of where you are right now, and the importance of being truly present in the moment, and it's easy to get overwhelmed with how much there still is to do, and how far there is to go on the journey. But break it down into what you need to concentrate on at this point in time, and give it your complete and loving attention, and life becomes breathtakingly easy and flowing and deeply satisfying.

You are your own masterpiece...
John Ruskin, a 19th century English art critic, wrote:

"When love and skill work together,
expect a masterpiece."

Of course this doesn't just apply to creating art, but to living life in general. It's that principle of "do what you love, and love what you do" - something that's fundamental to the way I choose to lead my life. It's one of the the keys of living what I call a "soul-full life". Yes, it's good to do your best, but it's not about expecting yourself to be the world's greatest artist or movie star or astronaut or inventor or whatever else - it's about allowing yourself to be the best "you", which is your very own masterpiece. It's about valuing and appreciating exactly who you are and how special you are. It's the unique gift of yourself that you are sharing - with family and friends, with colleagues and clients, and with the world.

This brings to mind one of my favourite quotes, by the French playwright Jean Anouilh, who expressed this idea beautifully:

"Love is, above all, the gift of oneself."

To live your life with love, and to be grateful for each moment, is great advice to live by. The more you express love and gratitude in your life, the more you give energy to this and the greater the flow of positive experiences.

Try this for yourself...
So... what are you grateful for in your life right now? Every day, for the rest of this week, try beginning your day by expressing gratitude. What are the three (or more) things you wish to give thanks for today? This might be people or experiences in your life, specific talents or qualities in yourself, special places or things in your environment... or simply that the birds are singing and the sun is shining! Focus on your heart centre as you do this, and feel the warmth of gratitude radiating outward. A beautiful way to start your day...

Here is a lovely affirmation to take away with you, from Denise Linn:

This is a glorious time to be alive, and I am so grateful!

Creating a fabulous future

2007-01-07T21:00:00.000+11:00

How would you like the future to be? Is this no more than a fuzzy, vaguely formed idea in your mind? Or have you sat down and thought about it in great detail? Do you have a clear, strong picture in your mind of what you truly desire to manifest for yourself - a dynamic image that inspires and drives you forward? If you don't, then now's the time to do something about it!

Whether you realise it or not, every thought that you have is contributing to creating your reality. If you want to know what today will be like, think back to what your thoughts were yesterday. Were you thinking about what you do want to bring into your life, or were you dwelling on all the things you don't want in your life? Simply by changing the focus of your thoughts today, you change your future - and by doing so, you can bring into your life what you truly wish to experience. That's why it's vital to be aware of what's going on in your head and to feed your mind with positive thoughts and images.

The saying "a picture is worth a thousand words" is absolutely true. Images speak directly to your subconscious mind and communicate entire concepts instantaneously. Today, I will show you how to create a powerful visual representation of the fabulous future of your dreams, using the simple process of collaging - this is what's known as a "vision seed map". Don't worry, you don't need to be an artist to make a collage! Nor do you need to go out and buy a bunch of expensive art supplies. It's a fun and easy process, and you can use whatever materials you already have lying around the house.

Here's what you'll need...
Before you begin, gather together all the materials you'll need:
- paper or pasteboard to stick your pictures onto
- some old magazines (you'll need to feel comfortable tearing pictures out of these)
- photos, coloured paper, kids' paintings, wrapping paper, fabric or anything else that appeals to you
- scissors and glue (a glue stick is ideal)
- some space to spread out (such as a table, desk or on the floor).

And here's what to do...
Begin by taking a moment to tune into yourself and let go of any preconceived limitations or constraints. Give yourself permission to be playful and use your imagination. I find that collaging is an intuitive process that comes together organically, so there's no need to think ahead to what the finished piece is going to be - the joy of it is in discovering this as you go along! To get yourself in the right frame of mind, ask yourself: What is the most fabulous future I can possibly imagine? How does this look and feel? Where am I and what am I doing, leading my most fabulous life?

Now go through your magazines (or, if you don't have any to hand, you can trawl through and print out images from the internet, eg using Google Image Search) and simply tear out whatever pictures appeal to you. Don't judge how or why, just gather images. When you've got lots of pictures to choose from, spread them out around you and pull out those that really speak strongly to you in some way. Begin to arrange and rearrange these on the page before you (ie your sheet of paper or pasteboard) and allow your collage to take shape. If you like, trim your pictures down and play with moving them around on the page, layering images over one another - this can dramatically increase the power of your collage.

Keep doing this until your collage feels "finished", at which point you're ready to stick the images down using your glue stick. Don't rush yourself or the process - if it doesn't feel quite "right" to you, simply leave the pictures there on the page (without having stuck them down) and walk away from it for a while, then come back to it with fresh eyes. Just make sure you're not judging yourself - allow whatever comes out to be "perfect" exactly as it is. And hey, if you feel later that you want to make another one for yourself, then you can do so!

It doesn't matter whether it's rough or polished, after having been through this process your collage will inspire you with positive energy whenever you look at it. Pin it up somewhere prominent where you'll see it every day (or you can even scan it and print out a pocket-sized version that you can get laminated and carry with you). What you're telling your subconscious mind now, loud and clear, is that this is the fabulous future I wish to create for myself - so go out and make it happen!

PS: If you haven't already done so, I invite you to subscribe to my free monthly ezine, Soul-full Connections. The January 2007 issue focuses on the theme of "a new year, a new you" and is packed with ideas to help you get off to a great start this year, including how to tune in and harness the energy of the new year, and how to create and use affirmations to support all of your positive endeavours. Plus, as a special gift with your subscription, you will receive a free copy of my ebook, Living in Bliss: 10 secrets of a soul-full life, with inspiring and practical strategies for building and sustaining a soul-full life. Please enjoy with my blessings...

Letting go to open the flow

2007-01-02T17:11:00.000+11:00

Happy New Year to you! Beginning a new year ushers in a wonderful surge of energy, doesn't it? I bet you're already thinking about all the fabulous new things you'd like to bring into your life - I certainly am! So where to start?

For a lot of us, the festive season seems to be all about filling up - with food and drink, gifts and good times. While this is lots of fun, it can also be pretty exhausting. So it's great to take a breather afterwards and give yourself some time to reflect and rejuvenate.

Reflect and create space...
What did 2006 mean to you? What stands out as your personal highlight/s for the year? What was your biggest challenge/s? Whether or not you achieved every single thing you set out to do during the year, take a moment to express gratitude for everything you did accomplish and appreciate what you've gained from your experiences. Congratulate yourself for completing another year!

Next, instead of leaping straight into setting a bunch of new year's resolutions or making a list of all the things you'd like to manifest in 2007, I've found that it's really valuable to first go through a process of releasing some of the old stuff. This helps to make space for the new to flow into your life.

Energetically, this is like starting the year with a fresh and clean slate, rather than just scrubbing out little bits here and there or overlaying more on top of what was there before. Believe me, it's a fantastic feeling to do this cleansing process!

Zen funeral...
The simple yet powerful exercise known as a "Zen funeral" helps you to get rid of mental and emotional clutter, freeing you up to focus on the new. It's not only easy to do, it's very cathartic!

Here's what you'll need:
- pen and paper
- matches
- fireproof container (eg metal or ceramic pot).

And here's what to do:
Take a moment to relax and centre yourself. Then take a piece of paper and write down all the things you'd like to release from your life - all the restrictions and limitations you want to get rid of such as fears and anxieties about money, work or relationships; outmoded ways of thinking such as poor self-image, poverty consciousness, blocking of success, self-judgement or old emotional baggage. Anything and everything that's been bothering you or holding you back in any way. Don't beat yourself up about what comes out for you - simply allow those things you wish to eliminate to flow through your pen onto the page.

When you've finished writing, sit for a moment with your paper and mentally prepare to let it go. Do this without judging what you've written. Simply give thanks for the lessons you've learned through your past experiences of restriction and limitation. After all, whether apparently positive or negative, every experience you have in your life is of value because it has contributed to who you are.

Then, consciously and deliberately, set fire to the paper and drop it into the fireproof container. As it burns, make a simple statement of release:

I now release all restriction and limitation. I let go of everyone and everything that has been holding me back from fulfilling my potential. I allow Divine fire to cleanse and rejuvenate all aspects of my life, and I joyously open to receive the flow of abundance.

Repeat this exercise at the beginning of each year, or whenever you feel in need of release and rejuvenation. In this way, you support yourself to regularly regenerate like that mythical sacred bird, the phoenix, which rose anew at the end of each life cycle from the ashes of its old self.

My wish for you is that 2007 brings forth fabulous new beginnings and a powerful new you, and may it be your best year yet!

Making a difference

2006-12-13T16:04:00.000+11:00

I was asked this week to share my thoughts about global warming: "How do we deal with that? What kind of future are we creating for our kids?" Wow, good question! And such a tough issue.

It's easy to feel powerless in the face of natural disasters like fire, flood, drought, earthquake... yet we can kind of comfort ourselves with the thought that these are forces beyond our control. But it's pretty confronting to contemplate the havoc we're wreaking on our environment and say: "I'm part of that..." It's not something that's happening to us - we're co-creating it along with everyone else, to whatever large or small degree. Not a very cheerful thought, is it?

But instead of sitting there beating yourself up about it, ask yourself: "What IS my part in this? And what can I DO about it?" Because I truly believe that each and every one of us can make a difference in the world - it's a matter of figuring out what and how. So, start small... and begin with the possible...

Raise your voice...
Having trouble believing that your voice or your actions can have an impact on something so big? Picture this... You're in an enormous sports stadium, watching a football match. There are only a handful of other people in the stands with you, scattered here and there around the arena. You feel isolated from one another and disconnected from the game.

It's actually a pretty exciting game so, occasionally, a fellow spectator tries to engage with it and raises his or her voice in encouragement, but the sound is immediately swallowed up by the vast emptiness of the space. So you sit there silently, passively observing, feeling like it doesn't matter whether or not you're even there.

Now picture the stands filled to the rafters with people. A goal is scored and everyone jumps to their feet at once, cheering loudly. The crowd roars as one and the sound can be heard for miles around. This feels completely different, doesn't it? You feel truly connected - part of a gigantic living, breathing whole.

Follow your passion...
Individually, it may feel as if your presence doesn't make that much difference to the Earth. But just as with the stadium analogy, collectively, every positive thought, every voice raised and every action taken truly DOES matter. We're all part of the magnificent living organism that is our planet.

So, what can you do? Start with something you really care about - passion is a great driver and motivator... Join an environmental conservation group, lobby your government to ratify the Kyoto Protocol to reduce global greenhouse emissions, get your kids involved in a local EarthWatch program...

Ride your bike or catch the train to work, drought-proof your garden and help your family and friends to do the same, switch to a hybrid car... Install rainwater tanks and solar heating at home, implement water conservation strategies within your workplace, take your community group to see "An Inconvenient Truth" and decide what action you can take together...

One plus one...
The future of life on Earth is in all of our hands. These are just a few ideas, off the top of my head, as to how you can make a difference. Of course there are loads more ways, great and small, in which each of us can make a contribution to being part of the solution, rather than the problem. Never underestimate the power of one plus one plus one... As my friend Paul Graham puts it:

"One raindrop raises the sea."

Overcoming procrastination

2006-12-05T18:50:00.000+11:00

How many times a day do you berate yourself about all those things still sitting there on your to-do list: "I should... make that phonecall... prepare for next week's presentation... put the washing on now... do the banking... finish editing that report... catch up on reading some articles... put my suit in for drycleaning... shop for dinner tonight..." We all do it! But it can be pretty wearing, can't it?

And that's just all the stuff that is yet to be done. Even more insidious, is continuing to dwell on all the things that aren't finished: "I should have done this... or I didn't get that done as well as I'd have liked..." Spending a lot of time focusing on the past - especially worrying about whether or not you've got everything done 'perfectly' - can really sap your energy.

What often happens when you're constantly directing your attention to the past or the future, rather than focusing on where you are right now, is that it all begins to feel like it's too much to handle and you start procrastinating about doing any of it - it feels too big or you don't know where to start.

Do one thing at a time...
So what to do about this? Well, the best strategy is to concentrate your energy and focus on the present, which is truly the only place you can directly impact. Instead of incessantly running through in your mind all those "I should do this..." or "I should have done that..." items, ask yourself:

"What is the ONE thing that I need to do right now?"

Try this for yourself - it feels much more powerful. Your mind actually helps you to sort your priorities and choose one to work with. This is a great approach to take whenever you're feeling overwhelmed. After all, you can't do everything at once, can you? So, simply by selecting one thing to start with, you draw in and concentrate your attention - and you'll find you can be far more effective with your time. You actually get more done by tackling things one at a time. It doesn't matter which one you start with - by beginning to generate some momentum, you'll find you naturally flow onto the next one and then the next one.

Reward yourself as you go...
Sometimes it's good to start with an easy thing, so that you can achieve it fairly quickly and give yourself a pat on the back for it. Then when you go onto something harder, you can remind yourself that you can do this - after all, you got that other one done, didn't you? It's far better to be kind to yourself and congratulate yourself for each and every little thing that you do get done, than to constantly beat yourself up for all the things you didn't.

Be patient and gentle with yourself, and just keep taking care of that one thing that you need to do in this very moment, and you'll be amazed at how you do end up getting through all those things that really matter...